My preschooler is off to his play-school. I have three hours of peace and quiet. Only a mom of a toddler/preschooler can understand the importance of the “3- divine quiet hours”!!
I don’t want to move or go out of the house in these few hours. After all, the rest of the day is total chaos! Today I had decided to visit the beauty salon for some much-needed indulgence. Yet, I couldn’t make myself get off the couch. After some reminders and self-loath, I moved my lazy self to get into some wearable clothes and dragged myself out of the house.
When I reached my destination, suddenly my mood uplifted. I had come to the right place. Getting pampered (or, just the sight of it) can work miraculously for girls (or ladies). Looking at the people there and just the anticipation of an hour of being massaged, cleansed and a good haircut made me joyous (even the torturous act of waxing my body seemed amazing!).
I had to wait for a little while to get the people work their magic on me. This is when I sit to write this post as I couldn’t stop the nagging writer in me from pouring out this experience for you.
Going and getting pampered once in a while is not a big deal if you will ask any girl. But things change drastically after you are promoted to the position of a “mommy”. That time is what you look forward to and it can help a mom free her mind of the continuous attack of puke, potty and wail that is sometimes unbearable!
I notice a variety of persons in there while I sit and wait. Some are chatty, some are busy reading some magazines and some even are busy sipping some coffee. I, on the other hand, am just happy sitting doing nothing and listening to the faint music playing in the room (except the part now when I am writing! I will be closing my eyes and losing myself to the music in the next few minutes!).
Why am I writing about this? Just because I feel like writing, and also because I experience the busy mother syndrome! That is, we moms are so involved in mommying our child (or children) that we forget to sit back and relax for a few moments.
This happens very often. Even if we find out a half hour in an extremely busy day, we don’t regard that time as “free”. We don’t do what we love doing. Instead we just try to find more unfinished work and get to it.
A major factor why one has serious issues balancing marriage, children and a dirty house is exhaustion. You can’t have quality time with your partner/spouse even if you have the time because you are always exhausted and don’t see light at the end of the tunnel. You have forgotten to be ‘you’ constantly trying to keep up to the challenges of being the perfect mom. This can sometimes ruin your marriage (and your sanity).
You can change it all by getting the much required “me” time everyday or may be every few days. Same rule also applies for a father. A man also needs some “me” time if he is juggling a job, a family and has half of the responsibilities of caring for a child (hats off to you; You are a Man!). Today, with both mommy and daddy going to work and juggling with child-care (which is a humongous ‘job’ in itself!), it is very much required to get some air and free yourself a little time where you will only be You (and not a father or mother or an employee or a boss or a spouse, etc, etc, etc).
It is very important to take out time for ourselves, do whatever we like doing every little while and give ourselves a break. You can find out as less as a half hour each day and get some exercise, or read a book, or go shopping (there needs a little more time though, maybe some weekends!) or visit a friend maybe.
This will lead to a relaxed and rejuvenated ‘you’ ready to face the battles of mommy-hood with renewed energy and focus. You won’t feel like a mad women who is about to lose it all and run away from everything (yes, ask any mommy and see if anyone hasn’t got to that point at least once!).
So while I go and enjoy my little “me” time and don’t think of the next hour, you start thinking what you can do to favour yourself some good quality time and be the happy, lively and functional person you had always been (before parenthood!).
Also Read Your Happy Mind